The Ultimate Laze Day

My goodness, today has been nothing but lazy. I slept in until 11 AM, had a bowl of cereal and then read my book until about 3 PM. I finally dragged myself up and got in the shower. I've been watching Lifetime since...a movie called Odd Girl Out. I'm waiting for Tony to get home with pizza and then The Bachelorette starts at 8 PM. I think it's safe to say that I whiled away this day!! My whole house is clean, I had no errands to run, no appointments to go to, and everyone was either working or in school. So I just took it easy. It was nice but I always feel like I could be doing something. I think I needed it though. 

I cleaned my house like 5 times this past week. Haha. I just feel like it always needs to be done and it so obviously doesnt. Sigh. I wish I could get rid of my stupid anxiety about having a clean and organized house. But it's just me, just my personality, and I cant just turn it off like a switch. Believe me, I would if I could. It's just built into who I am and I always worry about it, whether I'm home or not. I mean, it's good in the sense that I will never let anything get out of control (my home will probably never be wrecked, extremely messy or disorganized for long periods of time, nor will we turn into hoarders or pack rats because I simply cannot stand it). But I wish I could just not be thinking about how the magazines arent straight on the end table, or how I could reorganize our already super organized storage closet into something even more efficient. I'm constantly checking out organizing solutions at the store. I put away groceries and anything else I may have picked up at any store right when I get home with it. Everything always has to be organized and have a place. I notice if someone moves something and it's out of place - that's how organized my things are. I get anxious if something just sits out on the counter. And I CANNOT help it! I literally sit there and think about how it's nothing and who really cares....but the fact is, I care. On the one hand, at least I'm not some slob who just doesnt give a crap and lets her house get completely crazy and dirty and messy. I'm sure Tony wouldnt appreciate that either. But on the other hand, I wish I didnt feel anxiety about something being out of place. Now, I will say that I have grown to be a little more lenient with things since I've been pregnant; in fact, I've almost been testing myself because I know things will get crazy after I have a baby. I'm sure things will be disorganized, items will be out of place, and once she gets older, toys and stuff will be everywhere. I'm prepared for that but I still think our house will remain organized in the sense of the word, albeit cluttered and messy at times. It will never truly get out of control - I feel that deep down. Now I just need to let temporary messes go and not stress so much about little things that just dont matter.

Fingers crossed!!