They're Baaaaack.....

Sigh - and the crazy negative dreams are back! Lately, I've been dreaming about what our daughter would look like, what kind of personality she'll have, if she'll be a little terror or a sweet angel..... Sure, there have been some weird scenarios, but they werent necessarily negative. Now I've had 2 in the past week that resemble the ones I had in the first trimester. Ones of Tony cheating and / or leaving, etc. I hate them sooo much! Last night, I dreamed that Tony was married to someone else, so our marriage was a total sham. He couldnt possibly be married to me since he was married to someone else already. She came and told me and he didnt even care that I found out. I was so upset and he decided that he had to go read a Shakespeare play, cover to cover, in the park on the lawn (???) I was so devastated - and at the end of the dream I realized that since we werent officially married, the date 10.10.10 had no meaning anymore. And it would never happen again so I would never get the chance to use it again (it's like my favorite date ever, that's why I was so happy we could use it - I'd wanted it to be my wedding date - if all worked out by that time, of course - since like the year 2000 when I thought of it). But anyway, it was sad.....

I hope I have some nicer dreams, although as the due date approaches, I'm sure I'll have some freak out dreams such as something happening to the baby, me not being a good mother, Tony not being around, and / or a horrible labor and delivery (extending from my fear of hospitals and medical environments). Lovely.